My journey

My faith journey began when I was a senior in high school. I was secretly dating a young woman who I attended school with. I was not “officially” allowed to date her because I was not a Christian, per her father’s request. After being with her for about 9 months, I gave my life to the Lord. As we were on our way to a New Years Eve youth event, I was presented with the question, “Why not be saved?” I did not have an answer. Within two months of that time I gave my life to Christ. I do not have an exact time or day in which I gave my life to Christ. My acceptance/salvation was a slow process and not a quick, one night it happened event. I just know that I was “in the family.” Her family and my youth pastor were my guides and mentors on earth. I read the Gospels and other New Testament books which also grew what I believed and who I was. My formation was not easy for me, nor was it easy for those who accepted the challenge to help me grow. I am still growing in many ways and I believe that my spiritual growth will never cease. I am always looking for ways to grow as a disciple of Jesus. There seems to be an unlimited supply of resources available in the area of disciple building.

I have had a lot of influences shape me spiritually. One major one that comes to mind is my ex-girlfriend’s father. He was a lot of help for me. When I first became a believer, he was there to teach me, show me, and watch me be a Christian. He was there when I needed help and answers. I watched him in his home and he had also hired me for a few jobs. I was able to witness his attitude toward others and toward his family, which had just expanded a year before due to a new marriage and two new children from his new wife. Seeing how he dealt with family issues and growth was very beneficial for my Christian upbringing. Alongside of him was his daughter (my ex). She was there to help me and teach me when he was not around. She helped me in our relationship and personal issues and decisions. There was many things that I learned from the both of them and I am grateful for them. The next person that influenced me was my youth pastor. It was by watching him that gave me the passion to reach the youth. I was with him for a while when I had lost my job. I spent a lot of time at my church because I had not much else to do. I learned a lot about the dealings of the church and related issues. My next human influence was my Media pastor. I was able to watch how he worked and operated because I was given a position working at the church in his department. I saw how he related with his family and co-workers and how that differed from my youth pastor and mentor. There was a lot that I gained from my interactions with all these people.

Another factor of my spirituality was my home life. I was the first Christian in my family. My father is an alcoholic and a smoker. My mother is a smoker and a pack-rat (collector of junk). It is through my growing and watching them that I made the decision to never smoke or drink. My mom collects junk from old houses, antique shops, and yard sales. Over the years I watched as my backyard, garage, front yard, dining room, front room, and our computer room shrank in size because of the stuff that my mom brought home. June 2008 was the first time that I saw our dining room table in a long time. It was dealing with them and growing through all that that helped shape who I was spiritually and in the world.

I cannot say what any main point there has been in my life that has grew my relationship with God more than the initial salvation experience. I am not the type of person that groups and remembers events. I see all things that happen to me with the same emotionality. I do not rank events in my life as something that is better than others. There are events that I remember very vividly like they happened just now, but I do not rank those events as being higher than others. I view all events as ways to grow in my faith. Each new thing that I experience and grow in I see as a growth in God. He reveals Himself in numerous ways. I try to see God in everything that I do and I use that in ways that grow my faith and spirituality.

My understanding changes constantly. When I see events happen I try to understand how God was in their midst. Through my realizing and understanding of how God works in our lives, my ideas and comprehension change and adjust to how God is moving. My thoughts are seldom set in stone. There are things that I believe now that I will not believe tomorrow that I could believe again in a few months. I change when I witness God move. Every change is another step in my faith and maturing in Christ. My commitment to Christ is lived out by following Him and always keeping in mind my purpose and how I live to fulfill my purpose. I was made to serve and worship God. I see ministry as service. In my service, I am worshipping God. It is through this service that I am growing in all aspects of my life - the spiritual, emotional, and physical.